Feminists

seabeyond

(110,159 posts)

13. even when we are self-confident but not forceful we are perceived as bitchy, pushy, etc

Fri Feb 10, 2012, 04:42 PM

Feb 2012

and to ask a question.... OMG, you would think you are challenging the person. what? i am looking for clarification.

i run into that all the time, causei am straight forward and blunt, precise. that is what men want, right? we are told repeatedly we go all over the place to get to the point. and men just say what they have to. when a woman just says what she has to, she is such a ______.... didnt wrap it up all pretty, first.

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The "tone argument" [View all] MadrasT Feb 2012 OP

That is another good one. boston bean Feb 2012 #1

IMO, when anyone dismisses your conversation justiceischeap Feb 2012 #2

what I do Whisp Feb 2012 #3

The problem is that these folks are our bosses, partners, family members, HOA presidents, etc. yardwork Feb 2012 #12

you are tired of it? think how gd tired i am of it living it a lifetime. YOU dont want to hear it? seabeyond Feb 2012 #4

... redqueen Feb 2012 #6

+1 n/t Sera_Bellum Feb 2012 #7

Ignore them or ask them to deal with the material and stop whining about the tone. redqueen Feb 2012 #5

+1 n/t Sera_Bellum Feb 2012 #8

It's code for "I'm never going to support your point of view". Starry Messenger Feb 2012 #9

A man said exactly that to me recently. yardwork Feb 2012 #11

Ouch, I don't think I've ever encountered it in person. Starry Messenger Feb 2012 #15

Oh, the TONE excuse. That one makes my blood boil. yardwork Feb 2012 #10

even when we are self-confident but not forceful we are perceived as bitchy, pushy, etc seabeyond Feb 2012 #13

Exactly. Too forceful? Bitch. Too gentle? Wimp. These are all excuses to avoid communicating with us yardwork Feb 2012 #14

not up to saying much myself just now iverglas Feb 2012 #16

This message was self-deleted by its author seabeyond Feb 2012 #17

I appreciate all your replies MadrasT Feb 2012 #18