More Writing 2

[jfz9580m]

As an exercise I will separate out writing that is really only for the DU community. I don’t really care what anyone who gets past Dave and MIRT sees.
What is in my journal can be seen by people without an account on DU and there I will return to my more stilted style meant for strangers.

Actually, the bookmarks option is not that hard to use. And that should be fine.
It is still on the web and if someone had no life at all they could find them, but at least the intention - that it is a DUer having a shitty time and engaging in stream of consciousness writing or engaging inside the community should be clear.
That will restore my original sociopolitical mode.
I will never be anything but a dull academic in a narrow area. I am not an educator. But DU is likelier to have people who ..
Whatever it is where people want a restrained mode of personal political interaction with society or to share worldviews without it leading it swarms of creepy people flooding one’s street and harassing one.

This is not an open world game or a joke. I do not want this creepy stuff in my home or on my street. That is why I am going to the police locally. But that doesn’t mean that I have to lead a cloistered life. It is a barbaric reality and becoming more that way and where I live it is just creepy. And has been creepy since 2012.
Male or female these are largely people to avoid.


Thanks Dave and elad.

[jfz9580m]

1. Part 1: Normalization of The Panopticon is Grooming

Last edited Sat Apr 4, 2026, 01:25 PM - Edit history (1)

It is grooming women who: 1) do not work in tech, 2) do not want to work in tech, 3) do not want to waste all their time trying to figure out how creepy and unwanted rubbish tech works and 4) refuse to pretend that some sort of system of trust exists between a user (which has a dual meaning in my case, as an mj user) with a notoriously corrupt industry like the present day tech sector. The purpose is to dupe women into accepting ever increasing degrees of constant discomfort which a mere 15 years ago would have been considered super creepy and invasive. The invasion of living and working spaces without explanation in this way was unexpected.

No one sane trusts the contemporary tech sector. There may be some laggards who still buy the blandly sleazy and mechanical “progressivism” of Apple, Google, Microsoft, Facebook etc as anything but phony bs. But there are way fewer such people these days than say in 2015.

I will cut to the chase and keep this as simple as possible under the circumstances. Sadly I cannot be as laconic as I would like to be.

I am writing this mainly for women who might be receptive to this and even relieved that someone finally said it. This phase of undemocratic technological regress should be checked asap imo.

And you know..men!!!! Yes!! Bros!!!! Burgers and sports! Porn!! I don’t know..I am not very smooth and it tends to turn into rambling volumes of logorrhoea when I try to vaguely reassure..you know..men or something.

The gist is that no one is filing false allegations against you if you have absolutely nothing to do with me or my specific complaints. So go away. It is hard to target stuff this way. Local to me, yeah it is all creepy as was most of the last 14.5 years, but if you are some doltish random who takes it personally please don’t. Unless you work on creepy areas of tech while living in: Si Valley or a communist podunk in the global south and are generally like these guys:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_people_named_in_the_Epstein_files

I say doltish because sometimes it seems to be hard to get it through that at least in my experience (which has shaped me), for the most part at an appropriate distance most men are not creeps. But there seems to be a lot of general alarm when women start talking about filing complaints. I really don’t want to be sent back to the psychiatric hospital. I have come to fear male panic.

So it is okay man. Calm down. If you didn’t deliberately drive up and down a street in a communist state in the global south or work in a shitty Sidewalks Lab type of hell in Si Valley, it is not about you.

And there is something fake and disingenuous about fear driven fake empathy so I am not doing that anymore. But I cannot see that this creepy Panopticon is doing most men any favors either. It is a form of inquisition for men as much as for women, just in different ways.

And only a creepy subset of people trying to normalize each new creepy excess actually gain from this. It doesn’t even lead to tawdry pleasures for the vast majority whose job isn’t building, shilling or enabling this trash. And it creates a permacrisis and bullshit work (paid and unpaid). It has no pluses and cannot be forced as it was.

I tried this exercise over and over, but it wasn’t working. I have finally decided to keep it simple and about misconduct (in human subject research), malpractice (in psychiatry) and grooming, exploitation and harassment (sexual and other) involving the forcing of unwanted technological “progress” in Si Valley (Sept 5, 2011-Apr 18, 2012) and later in a podunk in the global south. This is largely a pleasant, quiet, sleepy place. But it is only a livable place minus these creeps forcing their misogynistic harassment and other creeps enabling it/dismissive of it.

There is no way in hell a non-malicious man or woman could fail to see how outrageous it was to force this here if you are honest at all about how socially conservative this place is.

Okay mindnumbingly stupidity and cluelessness would be the other explanation and that is not something to permit either let alone celebrate.

I will now flesh out all relevant details overtime as I finally set my life back in order.
This reminds me of my workplace from 2011. Coercive control sounds about right:

https://rainn.org/get-the-facts-about-sexual-violence/get-the-facts-about-grooming/

[jfz9580m]

2. Part 2: The Real World is not an Open World Game System or the Metaverse

The last 14 years & 8 months really were akin to a mental prison. Every week I plan to get back on the horse and have failed to in recent years especially.

I deleted most of my posts last week as every now and then I feel bullied into submission, i.e. that having to use the web to anonymously initiate complaints opens me up to harassment on my own street here in India. But that is nonsense.
And it is not my perception and a paranoid delusion etc. Can you just say the lamest tricks in the book?

The Streisand Effect etc are hyper-libertarian arguments used by internet companies and the worst institutions out there to draw a blatantly false analogy between the internet and the real world.

It is not a seamless continuum from the internet to the “real world” as people like that creep Andreessen or the monstrous people you find at places like Stanford would have you think of it. There are hard lines that separate the two which a disingenuous person would not find this hard to define. I am not normalizing anything I have seen since Sept 2011 (though it started a little earlier) just because most states have been as negligent as private sector companies, hospitals and educational institutions in my case, it doesn’t mean it will stay that way.

But I will start posting in this thread daily and keep my posts shorter and lay out important information as well as assert my right to be myself without being platitudinous and humorless to appease the types of people who engage in an even more insidious form of “she should not be wearing that if she doesn’t want to be assaulted.”

Iow that women who joke, make ribald remarks, swear etc in contexts that are in no honest sense an issue are themselves the problem not harassers and their enablers.

The problem is not what women wear or say around creeps. It is the creeps.
I have never policed people for controversial humor or swearing etc. But there is a line and it is crossing that to drive on my street or do fraudulent testing and snooping irl because someone posts anonymously on a website whose admins they trust.

But even without a pile of creepy social engineering (lie detectors, emotion ai) I have retained my humanity and understand human behavior in context better than dishonest people and their enablers.

This is a bad deal for young people, women and honest men. I have been angered at how much this has poisoned my formerly normal, unaffected behaviors around both men and women.

When you know very little about someone it is one thing. I have been posting here for years. When I first came back to DU I was - I don’t like the word traumatized even when it is not entirely inapplicable - more feral. There.

Language is important and very personal. I like animals (sometimes more than I like humans) so I don’t mind being compared to a cat or a plant or even a cartoon character. I don’t like being likened to a child or a teen or someone with mental issues that were not directly the result of shitty systems. Nor obviously to a bot.

Obviously I am not a potted plant. If I was and posting online that would be kinda cool actually.

I have been fighting above all this sense of anonymity (distinct from choosing to stay anonymous) that comes from feeling like this bulk processed, homogenized, blandly vapid or spectacularly lunatic brand of awful human.

I am a bit suspicious of what I at least see as PMC class language that I am not even sure is anything but liability consciousness.

While I am well to the left, I find it hard to join groups. It has made the last 14.66 years very hard. When I was reading about E Jeanne and more recently the 13 yo “boy-girl” who bit Trump’s penis when he tried to force her, I felt a pang of recognition. I felt the same way when I read about Sam Kuffel.

I grew up around my dad who is one of the most decent men I have ever met. But around my mom he swears a lot and even makes bawdy jokes. Which I as a child found very intriguing being a generally horrible child. My parents made a few attempts to instill some decorum in me, but gave up finding it altogether too uphill.

We were a happy, healthy family for all that maybe we would be seen as eccentric by someone nosy from a very insular and conventional family who wants to police people while being snoopy, creepy and mercenarily normalizing Google’s disgusting practices.

It wasn’t this sickeningly cultish, super creepy and invasive culture I got exposed to starting from Sept 2011 in California.

Imagine a collection of peeping toms and street harassers laying down the law re what is mentally healthy or acceptable. No one was calling it out and so now I have to as it is too much of a drag to endure.

This was such bullshit. I am filing all applicable complaints and I will be outspoken about it the way I would be.