The Sociopaths Among Us--And How to Avoid Them
This article is more than a year and a half old.Youre bound to come across the Dark Triad type of malignant narcissists in lifeand they can be superficially appealing. Better to look for their exact opposite.
October 19, 2023
By Arthur C. Brooks
We all have stories of meeting people who appeared wonderful at first but turned out to be just awful. Perhaps it was a charming suitor, or a charismatic colleague, or a fascinating new friend. They attracted you on initial impression, but before long, you started to notice behaviors that gave you pause. Maybe it was a little shading of the truth here and there, or a bit too much vanity and selfishness. Perhaps they constantly played the victim, or took credit for other peoples work.
Or maybe your disillusionment with the person was not gradual, but through a dramaticand dramatically unpleasantepisode. All it may take is a minor disagreement, and suddenly, you get screamed at, threatened with retaliation, or reported to HR. This kind of encounter leaves you, understandably, baffled, hurt, and confused.
Very likely, this person was a Dark Triad personality. The term was coined by the psychologists Delroy Paulhus and Kevin Williams in 2002 for people with three salient personality characteristics: narcissism, Machiavellianism, and a measurable level of psychopathy. These people confuse and hurt you, because they act in a way that doesnt seem to make sense. As one scholar aptly described the ones whose behavior shades more obviously into psychopathy, these are social predators who charm, manipulate, and ruthlessly plow their way through life, leaving a broad trail of broken hearts, shattered expectations, and empty wallets.
But at least these people are rare, right? Wrong. Dark Triads counted for about one in 14 people in an international population sample, a proportion that means all of us will meet them on a regular basis in love, in work, in politics, andmost obviouslyon social media. For the sake of our happiness, well-being, and wallets, we need to understand them, learn how to identify them, and steer clear of them whenever we canso that we can find better companions instead.
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SheltieLover
(69,863 posts)
SWBTATTReg
(25,413 posts)I'd like to think that all of us have an internal alarm that when we go up against one of these personalities, that our alarms will go off immediately. Some of us have friends that will warn you of such people too. So, listen to yourself, listen to your friends.
Skittles
(164,926 posts)GOP POLITICIAN, for example
SWBTATTReg
(25,413 posts)littlemissmartypants
(27,967 posts)Here's a list of traits:
Characteristics of Psychopaths
1. Aggressive, callous, and cunning
2. Complete absence of conscience and empathy
3. Very adept at manipulating others
4. Willingness to engage in immoral, criminal conduct
5. Willingness to take what they want and do as they please, regardless of who is hurt or wronged
6. Deceptive ability to appear outwardly benevolent
7. Deceptive ability to behave in superficially charming ways to hide purely selfish motives
8. Willingness to use intimidation and violence to control others in order to satisfy their own needs
9. Willingness to intentionally violate the basic inherent human rights of others
10. Complete absence of any sense of guilt or remorse for the harm their actions have caused to others
11. Rationalization of their own immoral behavior
12. Will attempt to lay blame upon someone else for their own conduct
13. Denial, will deny their own wrongdoing outright
14. Utter contemptuousness toward the feelings and desires of their fellow beings
15. Pathological lying, will say anything without any concern for truth to advance their own hidden agendas
16. Ablity to feign [fake] normal human emotions and empathy
17. Distorted sense of the consequences of their actions
18. Total failure to accept any responsibility for their own socially irresponsible ways
19. Strong bellef that they will never be brought to justice for their criminal behavior
Numbers 3, 6, 7, 12 and 16 make spotting them extremely problematic and that's before you wade through the toxic soup of their compulsive pathological lies.
Thanks for your reply, SWBTATTReg. ❤️