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'Trump Puts Musk in Charge of Absorbing All Drugs Coming into US'
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Taking advantage of the Tesla CEO’s special skillset, Donald J. Trump on Tuesday put Elon Musk in charge of absorbing all drugs coming into the US.
“Any drugs that come in will have to through Elon,” Trump said. “I can’t wait for Elon to go wild on drugs.”
Musk will discharge his new duties as head of a rebooted DOGE (Drugged Oligarch Governing Erratically).